“seve,” the musical comedy, er, the movie, is already in
the works. the brainchild of british filmmaker stephen
evans, it’s going to focus on the spanish prodigy’s adolescent days, including the 1976 british open at royal
birkdale where he finished second at age 19. although the
makers of “seve” no doubt have their hearts outside the
reach of their wallets, one has to wonder if the screenplay
could live up to the celluloid wisdom that precedes it. for
example, can it match classic lines from “the greatest
game ever played,” like, “easy peasy lemon squeasy,” or
“what’s that carrying his bag … a pygmy?” will it have the
high dudgeon of the rake episode in “happy gilmore?” “i
didn’t break it, i was just testing its durability, and then i
placed it in the woods because it’s made of wood and i just
thought he should be with his family.” no doubt there will
be a romantic subplot in “seve,” but will it be brought to
life with dialog like this from “tin cup?” “never bet money
that you don’t have on a dog race with an ex-girlfriend who
happens to be a stripper.” of course, the pinnacle of artistic achievement in golfing films remains “caddyshack.”
can “seve” deliver the existential angst of carl spackler?
where will it find inner turmoil like, “correct me if i’m
wrong, sandy, but if i kill all the golfers, they’re gonna lock
me up and throw away the key.” apparently, “seve” will be
mostly in spanish. that means clearing the artistic bar of,
“hey, baby, you must’ve been something before electricity,” in subtitles. so, as bagger vance said to glenn ford in
“dead solid perfect,” ”buena suerte, ya’ll.” —Jim Moriarty
09the seve movie
bob thomas/getty images
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